Tag Archives: growth

Leaders who learn from their failures

We all make bad decisions – foolish decisions, even sinful choices – at times.
I know I have made more than my fair share of foolish, sinful decisions. (Is there actually a quota for each son of Adam, I wonder?)

A Bad Choice

I was reminded of this in reading from Joshua ch 9 again, in my devotions this week.
Israel was on a roll: Jericho had fallen, then Ai. The conquest of the Promised Land was now just a matter of time.

True, there had been the unpleasantness at Ai in their first attempt to take the city: the sin of Achan that led to an initial defeat and their humiliation.
But that was the sin of just one man, not the leadership, or the whole nation. And with the recent subjugation of Ai that was now all behind them.

But the leadership – and, through them, the nation – were about to face further humiliation.
By their foolish, sinful choice, the leaders would compromise the integrity of the people of God.

The most painful foolish choices I have made have been those that jeopardised the integrity of those I led – whether in a church I was pastoring, or even my own family.

Most of us give a lead somewhere. Whether in marriage as husbands, in family as parents, in church as elders, at work as team leaders – most of us, at some point, bear a responsibility of leadership.
As such, our choices do not just affect ourselves, but impinge upon the welfare of those we lead.
When we make foolish, even sinful, choices there are consequences, not just for ourselves, but also for those we lead.

How are we to respond when we realise that those we are responsible for have been affected by our foolish decisions?
How are we to handle the awful truth that our sinful choice may cause those committed to our care to stumble?

Bad Responses

There are some wrong ways we might handle this.
These are various wrong ways I myself have sometimes tried.

1. The first way most of us are tempted to try is to blame others.

This is a tried a tested way, as old as Adam.
Rather than face up to the consequences of the most foolish choice ever made in the history of Mankind, Adam tried to blame Eve (and, ultimately, God: “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me of the tree, and I ate.”); Eve blamed the Serpent (“The serpent deceived me, and I ate.”)
Ever since, our automatic response, facing the consequences of our own foolish, sinful decisions has been to look for others to bear the blame.

2. A second way I can try and respond to the consequences of my foolish decision is to try and unlawfully get rid of the consequences.

True, there are not always consequences. Sometimes, in fact often by God’s grace, the long-term consequences are minimal.
I think such was the case with Peter’s horrible sin of denying Christ when, following his genuine repentance he found himself restored, not only in his relationship with Christ, but even to a place of honour in leadership of the fledgling church.

But where there are consequences we must face them squarely and respond to them in a godly manner. We may not unlawfully get rid of them.
When David discovered that, as a consequence of his foolish and sinful choice of Bathsheba she was now pregnant, and when her husband wouldn’t comply in effecting a more-or-less believable cover up, he chose to get rid of the consequences by murdering him.
Today, many get rid of the consequences of a similar foolish and sinful act by murdering the unborn child.

3. A third way is to pretend there are no consequences.

Where there are consequences they cannot be ignored.
Again, King David is a case in point. After having Uriah murdered, he tried to pretend nothing had happened. For the best part of a year he tried to ignore that there must be consequences, for both him and his people.
Lying and covering up are the ways we try and ignore consequences.

But a mark of genuine repentance is to accept if there are the consequences to be borne.

Godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation, not to be regretted; but… you sorrowed in a godly manner: What diligence it produced in you, what clearing of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what vehement desire, what zeal, what vindication! In all things you proved yourselves to be clear in this matter. (2 Cor 7:10-11)

To lie, cover up and ignore the consequences is a mark of a lack of genuine repentance.

4. A fourth way we may be tempted to respond is simply to give up.

I.e. to feel overwhelmed by the consequences and contemplate taking our own lives, rather than repenting and seeking mercy and forgiveness in Christ.
Following the murder of an innocent man, Cain cried out: My punishment is greater than I can bear!” (Gen 4:13).
Judas cried out “I have sinned by betraying innocent blood” and went and hanged himself. (Matt 27:4-5)
Neither could face the consequences of their foolish and sinful choices.

Yet both could have faced up to the consequences – and lived!
David murdered an innocent man, but faced squarely up to his sin and cried out to God:

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness;
According to the multitude of Your tender mercies, blot out my transgressions.
Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. (Psalm 51:1-2)

Though there were consequences (and there were, terrible ones, for the rest of his life) he was able to testify:

Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.
Blessed is the man to whom the Lord does not impute iniquity…” (Psa 32:1-2)

A Foolish Choice

Joshua made a foolish choice.

Had he let down his guard?
As noted above, militarily Israel was on a roll.
Religiously they were “on a roll”: their victory over Ai assured them of God’s renewed favour, and they had just renewed their covenant with God before the mountains Ebal and Gerizim.

Then the Gibeonites turn up in camp.
Only Israel doesn’t know they are Gibeonites; the latter deliberately set out to deceive them.
The Israelites are no fools; they know they could be being tricked.
So, relying on their own wisdom, and confident in their own ability to discern the truth, they put their visitors under the spotlight and examine them.

But they did not ask counsel of the Lord. (Josh 9:14)

Foolish decision. Sinful choice.
The Bible says:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding;
In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths. (Prov 3:5-6)

But:

Joshua made peace with them, and made a covenant with them to let them live; and the rulers of the congregation swore to them. (v 15)

Later, they discover the truth.
Now a people God had doomed to destruction, one of the nations that God had told them would be a snare to them in the future if allowed to live, lives in Israel’s bosom.

What to do?

1. Joshua could’ve simply blamed “the rulers of the congregation” who had gone along with the decision. Or even “the congregation” itself for “complaining” or for… well, for just being there.

2. Joshua could’ve tried to unlawfully get rid of the consequences.
But he had made a covenant with these people. And having just renewed the nation’s covenant with the Lord, he was conscious one does not lightly break a covenant, even where keeping it is to one’s own detriment. “Lord, who may abide in Your tabernacle? Who may dwell in Your holy hill? He who swears to his own hurt and does not change.” (Psa 15:1,4)
Yes, by this, he lost face so that “all the congregation [understandably] complained against the rulers” (Josh 9:18).
But he did not let that sway him; he “delivered [the Gibeonites] out of the hand of the children of Israel, so that they did not kill them.” (v 26)

3. Joshua could’ve pretended there were no consequences. He could’ve shut his eyes to the danger of having a fifth column dwelling amongst them.
But he does not.
He cannot get rid of the consequences, but he does what he can to lessen the detrimental effect they could have on future generations by reducing their status to “woodcutters and water carriers for the house of my God.” (v 23)

4. Joshua could’ve given up. He could’ve felt such a failure as a leader. Or he could’ve been so discouraged by complaints against his leadership, that he just gave up.
But he didn’t.

Living with our mistakes

We all make foolish choices at times.
Sometimes one even seals that choice with a covenant, as when someone “marries in haste, but repents at leisure.” But a covenant made is a covenant to be kept.
Thankfully, I can honestly say asking Eileen to marry me was, by God’s grace, one of the best decisions I have ever made.

But there are other decisions I have made that have been foolish, even sinful.
And, as I noted at the start, the most painful foolish choices I have made have been those that jeopardised the integrity of those I led – whether in a church I was pastoring, or in my own family.
There were even times when I was so mortified by my own failure, or was finding leadership so hard, I was ready to throw in the towel.

But the answer is not to give up.
Or, to pretend there are no consequences to our poor decisions; or to try and unlawfully get rid of the consequences.
Least of all, to blame my family, or my flock.

I think Roger Ellsworth sums it up well in his concluding comments on Joshua ch 9:

A final lesson for us has to do with living with our mistakes.
The devil would have us believe that sin disqualifies us from doing anything for the Lord! He uses this argument because he knows the effectiveness of putting as many Christians as possible on the sidelines.

Joshua’s handling of the Gibeonites shows us the right path.
We are to go on serving the Lord with our Gibeonites in our midst.
In other words, we are not to ignore our sins or pretend that they did not happen, but we also are not to let them cripple us or keep us from usefulness in the future.

Rather:

Let us get our Gibeonites under control, and let’s make them serve us while we serve the Lord.
How can our Gibeonites serve us?
They humble us by reminding us how weak we are and how we constantly need to look to the Lord for guidance.
God can always use humble people.

There is always more grace for you and me if only we can humbly learn from our foolish decisions.

God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble. 

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. (1 Pet 5:5-7)